The quiet yearning of a young Nomad; Remembering her.

Pittsford, New York, USA

The Class of 1985

“What lies ahead of you and what lies behind you is nothing compared to what lies within you.” ― Mahatma Gandhi

Are Nomad souls born or created? It seems to me, as I look back on who I was as a young adult, struggling with feeling "different" from the rest, that my Nomad soul was already present, and awakening.

As far back as I can remember, there was inside me a quiet yearning. No. Much more than that. A quiet NECESSITY; a mandate. A need for fresh air from within the dusty enclosed room; a room in which everyone else thought I was "just fine." Maybe even perfectly fine. But silently I gasped for air, and no one noticed. I wanted to breathe. I needed to go.

But I was reigned in, as many are. I was taught to achieve and place value in the things my fellow inmates valued. Ah, but judge not. I recognize that my cage may be another's happy place. But not for me. I always longed for more; to be out in the world exploring.

Am I truly that different? I wondered.

"She's not adjusting well," complained my parents to the school counselor.

Adjusting to what? Small talk? Awkward interactions over things that didn't matter? Yes, I do daydream. Yes, I imagine a future beyond high-school where I can finally live a life that beckons to me.

They call me quiet. Philosophical. Deep.

Deep, compared to what? I wonder. Is questioning why we are here at all - or seeking a greater meaning deep? Or is it crazy NOT to ask these questions? Especially as a young adult, when so much of life is about to unfold.

And unfold it did.